Faith When You are "Feeling" Small

While Jesus was in the
Temple, he watched the rich people dropping their ifs in the collection box.
Then a poor widow came by and dropped in two small coins.  I tell
you the truth, Jesus said, this poor widow has given more than all the rest of
them.  For they have given a tiny part of their surplus, but she, poor as
she is, has given everything she has.  Luke 21:1-4

This story touches my
heart on many levels.  I believe it took great faith for this woman to
give her two mites.  I wonder what there was about her that caused Jesus
to know that she was both poor and a widow.  Her clothes?  Her
demeanor?  We don't know.  We do know we can trust Him in His
evaluation.  So we know she was both poor and a widow, Both difficult
circumstances to be in in any culture or time frame.  

The good news is that
Jesus SAW her.  He noticed what she did and honored her for it.  We
don't know if he gave her any money, or just gave her the honor of sharing her

Little things are
noticed by the Lord.  Last Sunday morning (the Sunday we changed
to Daylight Savings time) I headed to our church service as usual.  I
admit I was tired, but I had purposed to be there for our pre-service prayer
time.  It is not a requirement for me, but an option I choose to take each
week (unless I am serving elsewhere during that time.  The Holy Spirit
quietly spoke to me, "I see you and it makes a difference."  I
said, "What"?  He said, I see your sacrifice to get up earlier
than you would have to, and it makes a difference to those who by their service
have to be there.  The sound team and the worship team come even earlier
to finish their preparations.  He said to me again.  I see you and it
makes a difference.  I knew my prayers were important as they joined with
the others, but I had not considered for how my presence would strengthen
others.  I know I do appreciate the others who make the effort to come
early to pray.  

Impart Ministries has
been in a different season than before Darryl's heart attack and stroke.
It has been difficult to clarify God's purpose and plan for our next
chapter because I struggling comparing the past with the present.  I am
encouraged by His faithfulness to allow me to touch lives through this blog
outreach, my Life Group and social media; but I fight feeling that my kingdom
significance has shrunk and we are not as fruitful as we used to be.  God
understands every area we may “feel” we are poor or not have or be as much as
others around us.


As I was pondering
this the other day, the Lord spoke to me, as I too look at different ministries
or ministers who have a larger audience I get either inspiration or
discouragement (admittedly depending on my security level)  others look at
me and say, "I wish I could do that".  It was an interesting
revelation!  Somewhere in their pecking order they feel I am someone to
follow after.  I felt humbled and encouraged to keep on walking and
trusting Him, no matter where I am.  Impart Ministries is a vehicle for
God to use for His Kingdom.  The responsibility to walk uprightly no
matter my situation or circumstance is something I can control with His help.


Learning to be content
in our current season of influence is not always easy.  I so enjoy my Life
Group Ladies, they are amazing women who love Jesus.  I trust that the
input will bring much output for His kingdom in the lives of those they reach.
They encourage each other and influence each other to grow and that is
awesome.  It is not all about me!


Pastors get bombarded
by comparison of church sizes. I know, Darryl and I fought that pressure when
we were pastoring.   It is all so relative.  The location, the
ministry focus, other churches in the area and sometimes but mostly it is the
grace of God and His purposes and plan that come into play.  Number
counting can be discouraging, whether it is with finances, people or square
footage.  Trusting Jesus to use what you have been given to the best of
your ability and then be content while believing for more is a challenge.
It is not just ministers that struggle with this either.  People in
all walks of life can be challenged to enter the competition comparison race.
Doing your best to grow in His character is a much better focus.
Trusting Him as you work hard, doing what you know to do, being thankful
for the lives He has entrusted you with brings that contentment Paul talks
about in Philippians 4:11.  I have learned how to be content with
whatever I have.


Feeling small is just
that a feeling.  Feelings come and feelings go, but as we build our
foundation and relationship with Jesus we trust Him to use us as He sees fit.
There are seasons of rest and seasons of high use for each of us.
Do not let the enemy rob you of your joy during either phase.  Keep
drawing near to Him, resist the devils lies and trust Him.  Even on the
resting shelf God uses us as we model trust during that time.  It does
take a different faith muscle to "rest in Him" during that season of
your walk, so work on developing it!


Father, no matter where my friends find their
selves today, I pray that you will bring a new level of trust and understanding
that you see them.  That if they are 'feeling" small in their world
for any reason you will show them their position in you and bring encouragement
to their hearts.  To those busy about your kingdom business, I pray
refreshment, strength and grace so they will make time to stay connected to the
living water stream.  Thank you for helping those who feel "on the
shelf" understand they are not off the team, but you are prepping them for
future use.  In Jesus Name, Amen